Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Achieving Inner Peace for a Day


For me, inner peace is hard to define. It is not something I consciously seek, but like many things in life, in the most unexpected moments, it happens and then you understand what it is all about.

It is not that I am an unhappy or dissatisfied man but my restless mind is churning continuously. I ponder, analyze and worry. As parent, I am concerned about my children's' future, as a husband about my wife's happiness, as a son, about my aging parents' health and as a brother about my siblings' well being. I worry about my work and the state of the world. I feel like Atlas carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. You couldn't tell that by looking at me but it is all there, clouding the recesses of my mind.


Last Sunday morning, I called my father in Beirut to wish him a happy 80th birthday. We exchanged a few words; he was never very good at connecting emotionally with his sons, but we could talk for hours about politics. As he thanked me for the call and bid me goodbye before putting my mother on, his voice broke a little; he was happy I called. My mother sounded relaxed and satisfied; she did not complain about her health. My youngest brother had visited from Morocco where he lives and returned the day before. She was happy to have spent time with him and satisfied that he was doing well.

When I put down the phone on that warm, late summer day, the clouds in the recesses of my mind cleared. All the people I cared about, those around me and those far away, were content and happy and consequently so was I. All other worries and concerns were irrelevant and temporarily purged from my mind. I felt light, relaxed and at peace for the rest of the day.

Who knew it could be so simple?
(Photo: A.K., Rainbow on a stormy cloud)

9 comments:

Abufares said...

That's a beautiful post Abu Kareem. I didn't just like it because of the many parallels in our lives but rather because I found my inner peace in your words.
Thanks!

Unknown said...

i like this part a lot:
"As he thanked me for the call and bid me goodbye before putting my mother on, his voice broke a little; he was happy I called."

Dad likes to yell at me when i call, then at the end of the phone call he apologizes and wishes me good night..it's his way of communicating with us too..

beautiful post :-)

Yazan said...

Like abu fares said, you do convey a sense of inner peace to the reader with these words.
You planted a warm smile on my face today Abu Kareem.

Rabi Tawil (AKA Abu Kareem) said...

Abu Fares and Yazan,

Thank you for the kind words. Glad you liked the post.

Golaniya,

If I had a trouble maker :-) of a daughter like you, I would be screaming too!!

Anonymous said...

your voice is needed

http://creativesyria.com/syrianbloggers/?p=42#comment-817

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

I've been reading every single post your write ever since you started the blog, this is probably the first time you write something personal, I now believe that you actually are a person, lol.

Loved what you wrote, peace.

RnD

Rabi Tawil (AKA Abu Kareem) said...

RnD,

I am flattered that you have read all my posts. I am dissappointed though that I have come across as wooden and unreal. That is really me in the small self-portrait.

Also, I have written a number of very personal posts. Here is one: http://levantdream.blogspot.com/2007/04/twentieth-anniversary-of-marriage.html or this one http://levantdream.blogspot.com/2007/03/mr-yazbeks-gift.html

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